Tuesday, March 23, 2010


DEAR MR. LOVER MAN,I’m in a relationship with my woman and we are 4 hours apart. We only see each other every other weekend, sometimes we squeeze in an extra weekend here or there and its been 6 months and I am in love, so is she. Is this a relationship that can make it? Because I sometimes find myself wanting her all the time and I have to wait. Thank you from Long Distance Lover

MR. LOVER MAN SAYS: Dear Long Distance Lover,
Your concern is one I find to be the norm when engaging in a long distance relationship. You want to know if I think that your relationship can make it? Of course I do, I believe love and io mean true love, has no time nor distance for existence. Some ways to make this work better is to find out what the goal is, are you guys willing to move closer, move together, is there a timeframe for that if so? These answers can give something strong to look forward to. The time you spend together must mean a lot. Express that every time you are not together, show appreciation and support. It isn’t easy for her too I’m sure. Do different things, make it more fun, ease the feelings of time apart. Skype when you can, sent letters, do not only rely on technology, become creative in expressing love. The real question here is how bad do you want this relationship to make it? True love can not be damaged by distance or time, true love will find a way until you both physically find a way. Good luck with everything, Let me know how it goes as time continues.

Dear Mr. Lover Man, I need help. I am in a bad relationship and I know its bad. We are at the end and I want to know how do you get over someone you love when they do not love you the same? Thanks, “Hard to Let Go”

MR. LOVER MAN SAYS: Dear Hard to Let Go,
First thing you should know is that it is not about the other person and as long as you focus on the other person, you have given more power than you should to them and not enough to for you to heal. How do you feel about yourself, what’s your self-worth to you, do you feel good about yourself? You have to be willing to embrace that YOU are the most important person in your world and that your happiness is more important than how the other person feels. Now let me ask you this, why is it important how this person feels about you if its over? Letting go isn’t easy, but it is needed, especially when you have nothing to fight for. It is un fortunate when love fizzles, fades or doesn’t exist and one party wants so much more than the other because they tend to mislead themselves about the situation and get mad at the other person for not feeling the same. You have to be more mature and stand tall. Love yourself more than your situation and know you are great. In a perfect world, love with be equally shared amongst two people but that is not going to be the case, one must learn to love unselfishly and not expect so much. Love freely and heal within. Never settle for anything less than what you are willing to give. Desire to love unselfishly and achieve it. You will encounter a greater love. Good luck and please keep me posted.

Ask Mr. Lover Man, I want to know if I should you tell my good friend that I am falling in love with her? I am feeling like she is the one. Thank you for your time. Anonymous

MR. LOVER MAN SAYS: Dear Anonymous,
This is not a yes or no answer type of question. Lets try to analyze what could happen and how strong is this friendship. The important thing here is the friendship, you knowing the person she is and if this confession will not hurt the friendship and you truly love her than I say take a chance but one must feel more confident in this choice. What do you hope to achieve from this? Be realistic with your thoughts and assess what the situation really is. Do NOT mislead yourself. If you are not sure she will accept this then say it indirectly, tell her about a “dream” you had. Tell her how much she means to you without creeping her out. This has to be about the friendship first if the friendship really means anything to you. If she isn’t comfortable with this confession you risk the chance of altering the friendship for the worst but if she is understanding then nothing gets worse, it may just be different for a little while. How comfortable are you with possible rejection? How comfortable are you with this friendship remaining the same despite your confession? These questions need to be asked when choosing. I say go for it, let it be known how you feel. The one thing you own in any relationship is how you feel. Just don’t be imposing about it, be honest without expectation. Tell her because you want her to know and not because you expect her to say the same. Good luck with that, send me a follow up email.

Dear Mr. Lover Man,
I am in a loving relationship, but my boyfriend is upset that we don't have sex as often as he'd like. I love having sex with him, but he's quick and there is no foreplay. He is not as big as I'd like but I've love the orgasms when I do have them. What can we do to make things better? Anonymous

MR. LOVER MAN SAYS: Dear Anonymous,
Communication will guide you through. Make him aware in a nice way the importance of foreplay for you, you can implement some foreplay, leading him into the action, play with yourself and ask him to help you without him using his man tool. Allow him to explore your body with you and do not let him leave that practice, express the joys of it, let his exploring be acknowledged with pleasure. Teach him your body other than your vagina. As for his size, you can teach him positions that will allow you to feel him more, you can add toys to your sexual appetite with him, Giving him the honor of pleasing you nonetheless. You have to find a way to grow sexually with him, don’t expect him to just wake up and make moves he didn’t do before. It doesn’t work that way as men are often creatures of habit. Give him new habits, he is used to it a certain way, break that way and kearn ways you both will love. Every sexual act wont be amazing, take some time to find amazing all the time. As for his releasing a bit too soon, you can help him with that too. Grab him and stroke him, ask him to inform you when he is almost there, the release him, give him time to desensitize and stroke again, do so orally and learn to do so vaginally. These practices will help him to last longer in time. Working together and communicating about what works and what doesn’t will get you both to the point where sex is nothing short of amazing. Good luck with everything.

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